- Wasn’t that a nice story?
- Again.
- Again?
- Okay.
- “Once upon a time, Cinderella lost a shoe, found a shoe and lived happily ever after.”
- Bad story.
- Again.
- Pretty smart for somebody who drools.
- “Once upon a time, in a faraway land “there lived a girl named Ella who was both kind and very beautiful.”
- Stephanie, what’re you doing?
- I’m looking for the giant glow-in-the-dark dinosaur.
- You know dad’s rule. Never put your arm into somebody else’s breakfast.
- Uh-oh. He escaped.
- Cowabunga, beach bunnies.
- Alright. Surf’s up, dude.
- Hi, daddy.
- I cannot believe The Beach Boys are gonna be on my show today.
- I am stoked. Whatever that means.
- You like The Beach Boys. I like The Beach Boys. We both like the same group?
- I must be getting old.
- ♪ Let’s go surfin’ now ♪ ♪ Everybody’s learning how ♪ (in chorus) ♪ Come on a safari with me ♪
- (in chorus) ♪ Come on a safari with me ♪ ♪ Surfin’ safari ♪ ♪ Yeah ♪
- Boy, we’re mediocre.
- Hold it.
- Steph, what’re you doing?
- Looking for a dinosaur.
- Check the Flintstone vitamins.
- Danny, thanks again for inviting me and Jess to meet The Beach Boys.
- Are you kidding?
- Joey, remember the first time we ever heard The Beach Boys?
- – Tried to become surfers. – What a disaster.
- Who knew ironing boards didn’t float?
- I remember the first time I heard “Good Vibrations”. I was in the first grade.
- Turned to my date, and said, “Have mercy.”
- What the heck is this?
- That can’t be my giant glow-in-the-dark dinosaur.
- It looks more like a dino-shrimp.
- – ‘Thirty seconds, Danny.’ – Guys, hang in there. The Beach Boys will be on in the next segment.
- Jess, I’ve a crazy idea.
- No.
- You know our jingle for Beach Butter suntan lotion
- – we’ve been tryin’ to sell? – Oh, sure.
- ♪ Beach Butter ♪ ♪ Butter your butt ♪♪
- – Yeah, I know the one. – Yeah. Well, suntan lotion, The Beach Boys our Beach Butter jingle.
- Gettin’ any connection here?
- Joseph, these guys are legends, man. We can’t ask The Beach Boys to sing a measly jingle.
- – It wouldn’t hurt to ask. – Wrong.
- You ask, and I’ll hurt you.
- Welcome back. I am stoked. Whatever that means.
- Well, according to our schedule, my co-host Rebecca is walking down the hall with The Beach Boys as we speak.
- And now, I’m getting a note.
- And now, I’m getting a migraine.
- Oh, uh, The Beach Boys’ plane can’t land due to fog.
- But hey, I promised you’d hear “Good Vibrations” and I never break a promise.
- – Oh, no, he wouldn’t. – He shouldn’t.
- ♪ I’m pickin’ up good vibrations ♪ ♪ She’s givin’ me excitations ♪
- And the second guy goes..
- ♪ Good good good ♪ ♪ Good vibrations ♪
- And the third guy goes..
- And the fourth guy goes..
- The machine goes..
- Hi, Mr. Tanner, ironing your tie again?
- – Is D.J. home? – She’s doing her homework.
- But I’m sure you’ll put an end to that.
- Tough break about The Beach Boys not showing up. I guess they had something better to do.
- You ever hear of fog, Gibbler?
- Danny, where’s the radio at?
- Quick, turn it on. They’re playing our jingle.
- Shh. Here we go. Here we go.
- (man on radio) ‘From a waffle to a falafel, you can get it all at Beenos.’
- – Here it comes. – Shh.
- ♪ Eat at Beenos ♪♪
- That’s it? I can’t believe it. They chopped our jingle to shreds.
- It’s supposed to go..
- (in chorus) ♪ Eat at Beenos today ♪♪
- Those butchers.
- (male on radio) ‘Okay, it’s time for our big contest’ where you can win a dream night with The Beach Boys.’
- Whoa, whoa, fellas.
- (man on radio) ‘Including two front row seats’ ‘for tomorrow night’s concert.’
- ‘Just be our seventh caller, and name The Beach Boys hit.’
- No, wait. It’s the seventh caller.
- Hello, you’re the third caller. Hello, you’re the fourth caller.
- Give me that.
- Uh, sorry. D.J. was on the phone.
- Gotta get that kid her own line, folks.
- (male on radio) ‘Okay, we have a seventh caller, what’s your name?’
- (D.J. on radio) ‘D.J. Tanner.’
- (all) D.J.?
- – D.J., you’re on the radio. – I know, I know, be quiet.
- – ‘Pardon me?’ – Not you.
- (male on radio) ‘Okay, D.J. Tanner, for that dream night with The Beach Boys’ ‘can you name this hit song?’
- (all) “Help me Rhonda”
- Uh…the name of the song is..
- Help me, Gibbler.
- (all) Help me, Gibbler?
- (male on radio) ‘Could you repeat that answer, please?’
- – What did I just say? – You said, “Help me, Gibbler.”
- Uh, I think what I said was
- “Help me..”
- (all) Rhonda!
- – Rhonda? – ‘That’s right.’
- (male on radio) ‘”Help me, Rhonda.”‘
- ‘D.J. Tanner, you’re going to be picked up in a limousine’ ‘by The Beach Boys themselves.’ – Oh, yes. – Yeah.
- (male on radio) ‘You’ll travel with them to their sold out concert.’
- Oh, thank you. Thank you. Thank you.
- Alright, a night with rock ‘n roll royalty, folks.
- And another chance to pitch ‘em Beach Butter.
- Maybe I can get ‘em back on my show.
- (male on radio) ‘Have you thought about who you’ll be bringing with you to’ ‘share this once in a lifetime night with The Beach Boys?’
- (male on radio) ‘I’ll bet everyone in San Francisco would love to go.’ ‘But remember, you can only bring one lucky guest.’
- Only one?
- Me. Me
- Cheeseburgers for breakfast?
- Hey, I can scramble yours if you like.
- I know what he’s up to.
- He’s making D.J.’s favorite food to butter her up so she’ll take him to The Beach Boy concert.
- Joseph, you’re a disgrace.
- Uncle Jesse, thanks for making a tape of my favorite songs.
- One disgrace burger.
- Hey, I had an extra tape and five hours to kill.
- Cheeseburgers for breakfast?
- Nice touch, Joey. Any fries?
- I bet I know who wants a plate of my mom’s double fudge brownies.
- I do. I do.
- Dream on, squirt.
- These are for D.J. from her best friend Kimmy…with love.
- If you think she’s gonna pick you over her own sister
- then you haven’t seen how I made her bed this morning.
- Guys, enough of this.
- D.J. is not gonna make her choice based on bribes or special treatment. That’s not how I raised my daughter.
- My first born.
- Now, tell everybody who you’re picking.
- – Yeah, come on. Here we go. – Okay, here it goes.
- I pick..
- Boy, I’d hate to see this end. I wish I could take all of you.
- But since I can’t, I pick..
- – Uncle Jesse. – Oh, yeah.
- – Hey, congratulations. – Congratulations.
- Well, what a surprise.
- – Have a great time, Jess. – Thanks.
- I’ll bring you guys back T-shirts and stuff.
- – ‘Yeah.’ – ‘Two T-shirts.’
- Oh, Michelle. That’s so abstract. So surreal.
- – Pretty. – ‘Pretty?’
- Yes, that too.
- But, honey, the secret to great art is to keep all the paint on the paper.
- Dad, is this a good outfit for tonight?
- Oh, yeah, that’s beautiful, honey. You’re gonna have a great time.
- – I can’t wait. – Uh, D.J., hold on.
- Um, just outta curiosity.
- How come you picked Uncle Jesse to go with you tonight?
- Because he loves The Beach Boys, and he’s a musician.
- Oh. Well.. That makes sense.
- I mean, dad, you’re a talk show host. If I won a night with Oprah Winfrey I would definitely pick you.
- Well, thanks, but I like music too. Just ‘cause I’m not in a band.
- I mean…I grew up with The Beach Boys.
- But, hey, it’s, it’s no big deal.
- Dad, you don’t feel bad, do you?
- No, no, it’s no problem.
- After all, I got to go with you, and see “Smurfs On Ice.”
- Go ahead. Go, get dressed.
- Okay, dad.
- Pretty.
- Oh, no, Michelle. Honey, on the paper. On the paper.
- Daddy pretty.
- Oh, no, Michelle.
- Can you say dry cleaner? Say dry cleaner.
- Jess, picture it.
- You and D.J., sitting in a limo with The Beach Boys
- you just happen to have a tape of our awesome
- totally tubular, gnarly, Beach Butter jingle, dude.
- A, don’t call me dude. B, it’s a dumb idea, and two, I don’t have a tape.
- Check your pocket.
- How do you do that?
- Never mind. Just think about it.
- Okay. Get out.
- You need to mellow down, dude. I’m serious, man.
- I said, can you.. Hi, how are you? Come in.
- Jesse, look at this. An original Michelle Tanner.
- One day, this will be hanging in the Metropolitan Museum of Art.
- On their refrigerator.
- Oh, great, you’re both here.
- I forgot I promised Kimmy we’d go ice skating.
- So, dad, I want you to go with Uncle Jesse to The Beach Boys tonight. Have a great time.
- D.J.
- What was that all about?
- Oh, maybe she thinks she hurt my feelings when she picked you to go instead of her own father.
- Did she hurt your feelings?
- Well, maybe a little.
- I just thought she’d wanna go with her dad.
- But I guess I can’t compete with Uncle Rock ‘n Roll.
- What’re you saying here? You’re saying that, that you’re jealous of me?
- If anybody should be jealous, it should be me jealous of you.
- That makes no sense.
- You have something going with these girls I’ll never have.
- I mean, like Stephanie. When she made her first ceramic handprint who did she give it to? Dad.
- And, and what was Michelle’s very first word?
- – Cookie. – After cookie.
- She looked up to you, and said, “Dadda.”
- And D.J., when she gets married who’s gonna march her down the aisle?
- – Dad. – That’s right, dad.
- See? There’s three good reasons why I envy you.
- I just hope one day, I’m lucky enough to have kids that love me as much as those girls love you.
- They do worship me, don’t they?
- Jesse…thanks for reminding me how lucky I am.
- You’re gonna… hug me, aren’t you?
- – You leave me no choice. – Oh, gee.
- D.J., look. I’m sorry I put you in a tough spot.
- Picking Uncle Jesse was fine. You two should just go, and have a great time.
- But The Beach Boys mean a lot to you. I want you to go.
- D.J., I’ve changed my mind about The Beach Boys. I want you to go with your father.
- – I’m not going. – Well, I’m not going.
- This concert was supposed to be fun. Now, everybody’s either hurt or disappointed.
- It’s just not worth it.
- – I’m not going. – I’ll go.
- You’ll go where?
- To see The Beach Boys. Wanna be my date?
- What’re you wearing? We should coordinate.
- Hold it. D.J. is going.
- I said I’m not going.
- Well, if you’re not going, then, no one is going.
- Hello?
- Excuse me.
- I’m on the phone.
- No.
- No.
- No.
- No. Bye.
- – Who was it? – Some beach boy.
- He called from a limo right in our driveway. I told him no one was going.
- – Wait. – Hold it!
- Did I miss something?
- – Catch him. – Hold it!
- (all) Okay.
- Hey, you’re The Beach Boys. Come on in.
- Would you mind wiping your feet first?
- Wow, you’re Al, you’re Bruce, you’re Brian
- you’re Carl, you’re Mike.
- Is there a D.J. Tanner here?
- Yeah, that’s me. Hi.
- We hear you’re not coming to the concert. Bon Jovi in town?
- – No, it’s a long story. – Well, we’ve got time.
- They never start the show without us.
- Let’s order a vegetarian pizza.
- Hey, who are these guys?
- Uh, Stephanie, I’d like to introduce to you the legendary Beach Boys.
- Big boys.
- Cute kid.
- ♪ Aruba Jamaica ooo I wanna take you ♪
- ♪ To Bermuda Bahama come on pretty mama ♪
- ♪ Key Largo Montego baby why don’t we go ♪ ♪ Ooo I wanna take you down to Kokomo ♪
- ♪ We’ll get there fast and then we’ll take it slow ♪
- ♪ That’s where we wanna go ♪
- ♪ Way down to Kokomo ♪♪
- Man, this is great. Hanging out with The Beach boys.
- Singing, eating pizza. You guys wanna come up, and see my room?
- What am I saying?
- – Jess, come here for a minute. – Oh, okay.
- Excuse me, uh, Beach Boys.
- This is our big chance. They’re at our house.
- – Give ‘em our tape. – That’s a good point, Joseph.
- They’re cool guys, they’re hanging out, eating pizza.
- – I’m gonna give it a shot. – Go, get ‘em, partner.
- – I don’t have the tape. – Check your pocket.
- How do you do that?
- Thanks, it’s really been a great evening.
- And for once, nobody bugged us to listen to some song they’ve written.
- I hate when that happens, Mike.
- Okay, D.J., who’s coming with you?
- Uh, well.
- – Beach Boy huddle. – Ho.
- Well, we talked it over and we’d like all of you to be our guests.
- Thank you so much.
- Kokomo.
- A request.
- ♪ Aruba Jamaica ooo I wanna take you ♪
- ♪ Bermuda Bahama come on pretty mama ♪
- ♪ Key Largo Montego baby why don’t we go ♪ ♪ Ooo I wanna take you down to Kokomo ♪
- ♪ We’ll get there fast and then we’ll take it slow ♪
- ♪ That’s where we wanna go ♪
- ♪ Way down to Kokomo ♪
- ♪ We’ll get there fast and then we’ll take it slow ♪
- ♪ That’s where we wanna go ♪
- ♪ Way down to Kokomo ♪ ♪ Aruba Jamaica ooo I wanna take you ♪
- That was really good. Thank you for singing along, everybody, on Kokomo.
- But now, we’d like to introduce some new friends
- to help us sing our next song. They are the Tanner family.
- ♪ Everybody say yeah ♪ ♪ Yeah ♪
- ♪ Ah, ba ba ba ba Barbara Ann ♪
- ♪ Oh Barbara Ann ♪
- ♪ Take my hand ♪
- ♪ You got me rockin’ and a rollin’ ♪ ♪ Rockin’ and a reelin’ Barbara Ann ♪ ♪ Ba ba ba ba Barbara Ann ♪
- ♪ Went to a dance looking for romance ♪
- ♪ Saw Barbara Ann so I thought I’d take a chance ♪
- ♪ Ba ba ba ba Barbara Ann ♪ ♪ Ba ba ba ba Barbara Ann ♪
- ♪ You got me rockin’ and a rollin’ ♪ ♪ Rockin’ and a reelin’ Barbara Ann ♪
- ♪ Ba ba ba ba Barbara Ann ♪
- ♪ Stopped Peggy Sue tried Betty Lou ♪
- ♪ Tried Mary Lou but I knew she wouldn’t do ♪ ♪ Barbara Ann ♪
- ♪ Ba ba ba ba Barbara Ann ♪ ♪ Ba ba ba ba Barbara Ann ♪
- ♪ You got me rockin’ and a rollin’ ♪ ♪ Rockin’ and a reelin’ Barbara Ann ♪♪
- How ‘bout the Tanner family?
- Let’s hear it for the Tanner family San Francisco.
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